The Christian tradition has, like other religious traditions, succumb to a temptation. The temptation is to provide proof texts and answers in defense of itself. In fact, what gave rise to the Christian faith were, I think, powerful holding environments (to borrow a term from Ronald Heifetz) where questions could be imagined, discussed and celebrated. Whether they were Jesus’ questions, the questions of disciples or questions from the crowd, it makes little difference. The questions of the gospel rarely get a straight or simple answer and those who pursue answers are often characterized as rigid fools. The gospel response to questions is often more mysterious and there is some sort of invitation to understanding. It is portrayed as frustrating and confusing to those within the gospel narrative and we know how they feel.
What is the difference between understanding and answers? It may be helpful to return to the etymology of the word understanding. To understand has been confused with “knowing” something or someone. The etymology of understand indicates “a standing between or in the midst of”. This suggests that understanding is an act. Understanding holds a tension between things. Perhaps in it we are held between our past experiences and our future hopes. Perhaps understanding puts us between significant individuals of our lives. But to just be between things seems a pansy-sort of stance. Why do I want to just stand between, in the midst of. Isn’t it more powerful to decide and stand on one side o or another? Aren’t we declared “willy-nilly” or worse, “non-committal” with such a definition of understanding? “I understand” can be such an impotent response to those in crisis, after all.
The spiritual discipline of asking questions seems to shed new light on understanding. Questioning moves understanding from a passive observation toward and active engagement with the world. In our questions to one another, we assist in the exploration of life. Offering our questions into our relationship with God, according to the gospel record, illumines the human being’s journey. Too often, I have been out of touch with the most significant questions of my life. I think this happens to me because those original questions have given rise to very meaningful relationships and experiences that define my life and its purpose. I don’t want to insult life’s meaning, my experiences, God’s gifts to me by seeming to second guess what has already been considered….at least in part.
As I consider John 3:1-10, this week’s lectionary text, it occurs to me that to return to significant questions (like “Who am i?”) does not mean that I don’t value the experiences that have risen from that question thus far. On the contrary, returning to the essential questions may be something like a miner who returns to a stable and robust mine. This mine promises so many gems, they cannot be carried out in one journey. And if the mine is the question….each gem is not a complete answer but part of what built the question. The question is the joy and the purpose and each portion of the question catches a divine light….that light illumines a chosen path.
When Nicodemus asks his question, “How can one be born again?” it seems to me that he is trying to understand his desire to return to questions without shame. He wants to keep their adventure at the fore front of his living. And Jesus, for his part, responds with understanding. He offers not another question nor an answer, but he offers modes of investigation for the adventure. After all, water and wind have always been masterful at finding their way into the spacious depths of earth and humanity’s geography.